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Saturday, January 21, 2006

What Bag to Use...

I was staring at the bags guests carried at last night's wedding party. I don't mean to be a Mr. Blackwell when it comes to the top 10 women who used crappy bags for weddings, but I can't help it! (I can mention a few sets of initials here actually *Matronistas who may have all the money in the world, but as the cliche goes, money simply can't buy class*)

1. Rich real estate matronista Queenie. Woman, you may have all the beautiful houses and vast land (and yes, I am jealous. Damnit, I'm greeeen with envy *hehehe*), but you have got NO bag sense whatsoever! Wearing a silk sheath (by the way the color peach makes you look pasty-- it's either that or your makeup... or both!) that is ill-fitting on your body is bad enough, but carrying a branded Doctor's bag?? Come on. *cough cough* Que horror!

2. Here's another lady: Taitai. Married a rich guy's son, made it her career to have lotsa kids. No work but plenty pay. In Cantonese, she would be aptly described as a tai-tai (hence her nickname). She has in her days, been the subject of much, much gossip. Anyway this wench is somewhat of a fashion quagmire. While she is still young, she carries bags like she's a matronista. And tonight was no exception. Sad I tell you. Oh and her own mama and sister-in-law are totally ugh... I'd rather not even say anymore for fear of being reminded of them in my dreams. *now THAT would be a nightmare*

Anyway I think I've been too much of a biatch already (darn do I have that much angst??? That is soooo not me, especially with my supposed strict adherance to my New Year's resolution of being nicer, learning to be more diplomatic, and shutting my piehole when there is no emergency reason for opening it in the first place). So I'll leave what I just said to your imagination. I will never confirm or deny who these objects of my ire are.. hehe what unlucky women! I don't really have any one thing against lady #2-- in fact, sometimes I wish I could tell her that she needs to be made over. Lady #1 however, I have every reason to be appalled at-- she is a snooty little sod who'd mock you for not knowing a chi-chi designer brand (come on, biatch, we were all designer greenhorns once!)

So in light of these two women, I want to throw in a short list of bags you should NOT carry when you attend a wedding party.
1. A big shopping tote: Even if it's a Chanel or a Fendi, you don't want to look like you just came from the office or a shopping expedition at 168 prior to the wedding. :D *Sorry for being so biatchy, just telling it like it is!*

2. A doctor's bag: Anything chunky that you think doesn't really work with your outfit, won't work with your outfit. And even if it's an LV neverfull bag, it still WON'T work as a wedding party bag.
3. A large satchel: Even an exotic bag with real Chinchilla and lizard trims won't make it an appropriate bag for a wedding. At all. (p.s. this Marc Jacobs bag is realllly bugly)

The key is to use a bag that's not chunky, not too large, and not casual. I have always used non-designer bags to weddings (save for the exception of the small LV satin bag that I used tonight). As long as they are relatively small, nothing too distracting to the eye (i.e. a leopard print), it's ok. A clutch is a good style to use. Also some women like carrying the Lady Dior bag (reminiscent of Princess Diana of Wales) I also prefer to use non-leather bags as well. Satin is my top choice for weddings. While satin is quite high maintenance, you don't really use it everyday, so it won't wear out that fast.

Again, my wedding party bag guidelines are not meant for everyone. But bottom line is, NEVER EVER Carry a FAKE designer bag to a wedding. THAT would be a MAJOR fashion faux pas, one that is unforgivable. Really.

Later hags!